5 Minutes {Half Marathon Training Check-In}

Training is going slowly, but is going. The Couch to 10K program is a three day a week program. My crazy schedule only allows me to regularly hit the gym twice a week, three if I'm lucky, but I believe that twice a week is better than none a week, and although the training is slow I am amazed at the stamina I am building, and excited about the pounds that have started dropping.

I started my program four weeks ago today, and since day one, have been dreading week four of the program. Couch to 10K is an interval program, and each week of the program includes three days of the same interval training. Here's what I've done so far:

Week 1 - Run 60 seconds, walk 90 seconds, 20 minutes total

Week 2 - Run 90 seconds, walk 90 seconds, 20 minutes total

Week 3 - Run 90 seconds, walk 90 seconds, run 3 minutes, walk 3 minutes, 18 minutes total

Today began week four - run 3 minutes, walk 90 seconds, run 5 minutes, walk 3 minutes, 22 minutes total. It's the five minutes I've been dreading since day one. Five whole minutes of running. To those of you who truly are runners, this is nothing to you, but for someone who has never ever been a runner in her entire life, five minutes of running sounds like five miles...it scared the crap out of me.

And I kicked it's ass.

There is something that happens when you are running and you know you are going to meet a milestone. It's like that first week, on the second day when I was in my last run and didn't stop once during the any of the intervals - I wanted to stop in the middle of the track and do cartwheels and shake my booty to the Rocky music in my head because I DID IT. That's how I felt today. That's how I felt after my first five minute interval when I was beaming like an idiot on the treadmill and the old lady next to me probably thought I was losing my mind. It's how I felt at the end of my second five minute interval, when even after my phone had gone flying off of the treadmill at the poor old lady (don't worry, it missed, and I seriously need some wireless headphones), and I didn't use that as an excuse to stop - rather, I just kept an eye on my timer clicking away on the phone on the floor, stupid smile still on my face.

That first week when I could barely run 60 seconds I wondered how I could ever run for five minutes.  Today I giggle that 60 seconds was so difficult for me. I still wonder how I will ever run for 13.1 miles, but I have to remember that small goals lead to big goals.

I can't wait until I can laugh out loud that I could only run for five minutes, but today I'm going to be pretty proud of myself for meeting this little-big goal.

Sometimes I Cry

I don't think anything has ever made me cry as much as parenthood. There are the days when everything is so difficult, and all the rules and the listening and the patience have gone out the window. But what gets me the most, what really brings those tears to my eyes are the moments like this:

• When she grabs my hand, just to walk across the living room.
• When she stops me just before I leave her room at night to say "I love you, little guy"
• When she hugs me so hard it almost hurts.
• When she asks me to rock her and I feel her entire body relax.
• When she sits in my lap and says "Sing to me mumma."
• When she grabs my face (literally, grabs my face) and tells me she loves me.
• When she sings me a song.
• When that song is "Mumma, mumma, she's is awesome, she is awesome."
• When she throws her arms around me and sways during Barney's "I Love You." (It's enough to make you forget you're watching Barney).
• When I watch her play independently and use her imagination, making up stories about her toys.
• When she sees me and runs, full force with her arms open wide to give me a big hug.
• When she knows I have a headache and gently kisses my forehead and tells me "There mumma, you all better now."
• When she is awake.
• When she is asleep.
• When she is.

I can't imagine my life without her.